Making of a Mom: Losing Myself so I could Find Myself [Verily Magazine]

I didn’t look forward to becoming a mother. 

When my then-boyfriend, now-husband and I had that conversation, it went something like this:

“What do you think about kids?” I asked, probably sipping on an iced latte in one of my favourite New York City coffee shops.

“I think being a dad is something I definitely envision for the future. How about you?” he returned the question.

“I don’t feel the need to have kids. But I guess I don’t mind?” I responded vaguely.

I wasn’t excited about children because I had plans for my own life, things I wanted to accomplish. In my mind, children would get in the way of that. I thought of motherhood as a role of endless self-sacrifice — something I was not particularly excited about. With that conversation, I felt the clock began to tick on my ambitions.